What is the first thing that comes to your mind at the mention of the word Diabetes?  Some problem arising out of unmanageable sugar levels, right? Yes and you think that is all there is to it.   Do you realize that most diabetic patients suffer from sexual dysfunction too?  Considering that Diabetes catches men young these days; it is indeed a grave thought, not to mention the mental pressure and depression they suffer; it is imperative that people become more aware about this deadly disease that can slowly, torturously squeeze the zest out of your life.  

Being sexually active is very important to do your best in life.  Almost everything in a man-woman relationship ultimately boils down to enjoying a good sex life.  Everything, from the way you dress to the car you drive, your mannerisms, your desire to succeed in life can be indicative of or connected to the healthy sexual relationship you enjoy.  Needless to say, a depressed person may not be able to maintain an aroused sexual passion, which leads to further mood swings and heightened depression. 

Diabetes causes the inside of the arteries to be lined with plaque.  This reduces the amount of blood flow to the penis, which may not cause the desired state of hardness to facilitate penetration and enjoyable sex.  They may also suffer from diabetic neuropathy, which damages the nerves; another cause of erectile dysfunction.  For women, diabetes can lead to hardening of the blood vessels of the vaginal wall causing decreased blood flow which can affect vaginal lubrication.  Vagina becomes too dry during sexual intercourse, which is most uncomfortable.  It also puts them at greater risk for recurring yeast infections.

I have come across many cases where a simple treatment such as counseling has helped to a great extent.  Most diabetic patients who have joined the gym, exercise not only to keep themselves healthy, but also hope to rejuvenate their seemingly lost sexual prowess and energy.  Yes, exercise does help to a great extent, but more has to be done to feel comfortable in living with the fact that you may have lost the ability to enjoy one of the greatest pleasures God has given you.  

Let’s get to the key points that will help you put you back on track.   One of the most important things that keep alive sexual desire is fantasizing about it.  Do you have the time and the inclination to do that?  Or have you already accepted and resigned to the fact that your libido isn’t so aroused at the mention of sex?  Answering these questions immediately helps you take the first step to correcting and formulating a new strategy to liven up your sex life.  Do you remember the time when sex was all that you thought about; the time when you were a teenager and sexual fantasies ruled the roost in your mind?  Do you realize the biggest lie you ever said is “Now I am more mature and sensible, lust does not rule my mind now?”   Isn’t that a very shrewd way of fooling others and also accepting the fact that you are almost a good-for-nothing now?  Do you hear a low moan deep in your heart when you say that? 

Now the question I want to ask you is are you ready to fight back?  Are you going to succumb to this disease and condemn yourself to the life of a lowly eunuch?  Where did that energy and excitement that came to you when a good looking girl just looked at you, go?  Hey, calm down; it is all still there and simply waiting to be unleashed.   You have incarcerated the best part of your mind in a cocoon of lethargy, false pride and above all, depressive stupor. 

When you were a teenager, time management was not a problem at all.   You simply allotted the maximum time for the opposite sex and then the rest to eating, sleeping and studying; in that order.  You are all grown up now and whether you like it or not, there are things that must be done.  Your ego, social status and income depend on how well you do at your office and not in your bedroom.  This leaves you a little short of time for fantasizing about sex, to your liking.   Do you realize how badly it has affected your sex life?   So let’s start with finding time for sexual fantasies.  

Hey, I am not asking to spend the entire day, dreaming about how to go about wooing Deepika Padukone, now that she is single.   But don’t tell me you do not have five minutes to spare in the morning and evening to daydream about bringing your long lost passions and desires to the upper crest of your cerebral cortex.   Use all the magazines or photos or the internet that is available at hand, but actively encourage your mind to dwell in the pleasurable frame of this aura; swim in the warm pool of this heightened erotic arousal and aggressively project & picture yourself as a person women cannot resist.  Do not allow reasoning, logic and analytical skill to interfere with your fantasies, but simply indulge in your wildest dreams by letting your mind go adrift.   Do this twice a day, each session lasting about five minutes.  The best and the safest place to do this would be your toilet, where you can be sure no one is watching you squirm in pleasure.   But whatever be your dreams, wherever you choose to do it; do not ever miss out on it.  It is so very important in rebuilding your damaged, crest fallen self to its lost glory.

Have you ever observed the single most destructive thought that surfaces in your mind when you are about to have sexual intercourse with your girl?  It is, “What if I fail again?”   Now, nothing can be more damaging to yourself “rising to the occasion” than this particular thought.  How do you deal with this incursion into your aroused state of mind; that which throws cold water on your fire of sexual desire?  You panic, try to run away, force yourself to focus on the job at hand; all of which only serve to dampen your muddy surface of defenses.   Once you admit to such a failure, the more the chances of this particular thought scoring over you again. 

There is only one way to deal with this pressure and that is, admitting to your woman that you may fail again.  Make her understand it is important that she does not put any pressure on you to perform or slink away from you in disgust.   The only person you can count on at these moments of despair is your wife.  She is also the only person who will not discuss this with anyone else.  So, more importance has to be given to teaching yourself to love her again, not to take her for granted and start your love-life all over again.  Once the pressure is off your mind, you can be with her, indulge in your fantasies, and slowly work up a good mood before actually letting yourself into the act.  Always remember that sex is only a physical extension of love and you are only trying to love her more and more.   And the more you love her, the better your sex life is going to be.